Thursday, August 11, 2011

You can't make this stuff up

King Solomon wrote it, Pete Segar made it a song, and in 1965 the Byrds recorded it as a number one hit.
"To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven. A time to weep, and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance."

Let's laugh a bit.

A 33 year old woman comes into the ER complaining of painful hole to the bottom of her foot.
"How long has it been bothering you?"
"2 years"
I look at the bottom of the foot,
There's a wart.

A women is held overnight in the ER because of alcohol intoxication. In the morning she explains what happened.
"The voices in my head told me to drink"
Then she adds, "they sounded familiar, I think they might have been me"

Nurse, "welcome to triage. Could I have your social security number? "
Patient, "047-52-___"

Nurse, "Sir, what's your level of pain?"
Patient, "You mean now?"
(As opposed to when????????)

Nurse, "on a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your pain?"
Patient, "12"
Nurse, "no, if 0 is no pain and 10 is the worst pain you've ever had in your life, what's your level of pain?"
Nurse, "no, I mean if 10 is the worst pain you've ever experienced in your life, including right now, what's your level?"
Nurse, "just so that I understand. Your telling me that the pain you have right now is more than you've ever experienced, and that it's worse than the pain you have now?"

You can't make this stuff up.

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